Connection in the larger picture

Monday morning, 7 a.m. I've just woken up, and less than thirty seconds later, my son is sitting in the middle of my bed and starts talking incessantly. I answer mechanically and look out the window. I can't think of anything other than silence and coffee.

It's not at all in keeping with my personal rhythm to be overwhelmed with life first thing in the morning. I actually need at least an hour to myself to start the day calmly and then be able to respond to the needs of others in a relaxed manner. If I'm honest, it actually takes even longer.

But two to three hours every morning just for me, during the week? We don't allow ourselves that in our society, even if we don't have children.

A few months ago, I was visiting a couple of artist friends. We gathered at the kitchen table at 10:00 a.m., ate breakfast until noon, and chatted in the spring sunshine about where we wanted to go for a walk that afternoon.

At some point I expressed my astonishment at this relaxed approach:

“Tell me, are you on vacation right now, or do you always live like this?”

The two looked at me in confusion and almost amused and said:

"No, Sarah, not a vacation. This is our life."

Pause

Given this background, I imagine it's quite easy to always stay centered and draw on inner strength. But even those who appear to lead the most relaxed lives on the outside are often fighting the same battle on the inside—this is also the case with my friends. Let's not fall for the idea that others have it better because their situation is different.

How can I rest within myself when my daily routine, from morning to night, rarely corresponds to my natural biorhythm and my needs? How is it possible to draw strength from this place that springs not only power, but also passion, joy, peace, frustration tolerance, and the faith to pursue new and great dreams?

I breathe in

I breathe out

feel deep inside me

move out

into the wilderness of the larger context.

This unknown great is

what holds us all together.

How should we get up in the morning

if we don't know that what we are doing

makes a deeper meaning?

And isn't it true that actions without meaning rob us of our strength?

That is why I remind myself every day,

that my life

- firstly -

never has to stay the way it is if I don't like it

if it is not truly and deeply mine in every fiber.

I am in the driver's seat and have the rights to my everyday life.

It may hurt sometimes,

but when I breathe in I feel what is inside me

and can move and change it.

- secondly -

is part of a bigger picture.

When I see the mighty crown of a tree above me

or during yoga the streams of life flow through me

I remain without a doubt astonished and silent

in the face of the depth that every breath, every chance of a new day

every real encounter carries with it.

Deeper, further higher

There is a magic behind all the everyday

the unspeakable

that makes us sit up and take notice.

Wasn't there a song inside me just now? An image? A brief inkling, a feeling?

This pattern touches me, and look, that color. The sound in that voice... what is it? It speaks to deeper chambers of my soul.

The bigger picture was touched.

And now I have strength again

to face everyday life a little easier.

It's about more than just a hip lifestyle, embracing a cultural wave through a certain style, or following a trend. All of that is just childish playfulness that we are allowed to enjoy.

But it will not fulfill us, even if we had a daily routine that, down to the smallest detail, meant pure relaxation or adventure, depending on our preferences.

There is more.

Some days I can feel it, it seems everywhere.

When I learn to align myself with this inner perception, the miracle of daily strength occurs. I am connected to the ineffable, to which we humans give so many different names. It means our lives.

and if we are honest, we know that.

Our lives make a difference. Every conscious breath makes us feel it.

Every gentle gesture, every sincere eye contact. This is where I want to be.

From here I am strong - even in weakness.

This is what I want to pass on to my children:

Choose freely for the life you want -

but remain focused on the source from which this life springs.

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