How I changed 3 years of meditation (part 1)

Almost every day for the past three years, I sat for a few minutes on the floor, a chair, or my meditation cushion—in silence. How I came to meditation and how I practice meditation.

I was quite surprised a few days ago when I realized that I've been meditating for over three and a half years. How time flies! I'm using this thought to reflect on my "meditation journey." I wanted to document the results in a blog post.

A podcast that opened a whole new world to me

When I started meditating, I was 19 years old and felt like a completely different person. (That's what you always think when you look at your past self, right?) 😋) Anyway, I had just started my psychology studies and moved into my first apartment – a new phase of my life.

About the then brand new podcast “Happy, Holy & Confident” by Laura Seiler, which was suggested on the homepage of my podcast app, I then became aware of the topic of personal development one day.

The search for happiness and personal growth had long followed me, but only on a personal level. I didn't realize that there were books, lectures, seminars, podcasts, and even scientific findings on the subject. I was completely fascinated by the whole thing, and I began devouring all of it. In the process, I quickly became aware of mindfulness, yoga, and meditation. Until then, meditation had been some kind of spiritual nonsense to me—my head conjured an image of a monk in a floor-length robe, squatting cross-legged on the floor in a Far Eastern monastery—which I couldn't really relate to. But I had never really delved into it.

The art of doing nothing

When I learned what meditation actually means (being, pausing, observing, living in the present moment), I was totally hooked and wanted to try it myself:

Just do nothingWhen was the last time I did nothing? Can I even allow myself to do that? How does it feel to just be?

Let your thoughts pass by? Let silence prevail? Clear your head?

Wow. 😯 All of this sounded incredibly exciting to me and like a kind of freedom I hadn't experienced in a long time.

I was used to having what felt like a thousand thoughts every second. I was constantly weighing what might happen. I had one foot in the past and the other in the future. I quickly got caught up in negative thoughts and worries.
Even now, I would definitely describe myself as an "overthinker." I think a lot, but say very little. I'm just often in my head.

This also means absorbing all possible information before actually doing it (which has its advantages and disadvantages). So, I knew it would take time for the meditation to have positive effects. This meant I had no expectations when I embarked on it.

Take: A chair, an app and yourself

At least that's how it looked to me at first.I was wary of sitting in complete silence for an extended period of time, so I decided on two things at the beginning: I wouldn't overexert myself, and I would take it slow.

The time factor

I started meditating for 3 minutes. Then 5. Then 10, then 15. I've mostly stuck with 15 minutes. Because that's a realistic time frame that I can and want to devote to every day. Some days it's 10 minutes, other days 30. But the average is definitely 15 minutes.

I prefer to meditate in the morning, right after I wake up. That's when my mind is at its clearest, and I can start the day calmly and relaxed. But meditation also helps me in the afternoon or evening before bed.

I now meditate every morning. Depending on the need, I sometimes add a meditation in the afternoon or evening. If I skip a day, I don't beat myself up about it anymore. At first, it was important to me to have no interruptions in my meditation streak, but now I don't take that as seriously at all. After all, meditation should be good for you, not another "task" or even a burden.

The auxiliary factor

Okay, I don't think that's a word at all, but you'll get what I mean. 🤓As I said, at first I didn't dare to be completely alone with my thoughts. I wanted a little support, some guidance. That's exactly what I found in guided meditations. A person (or, in the case of an audio recording, a voice) leads the meditation, providing information, suggestions, and instructions.

I started with the Headspace app. It teaches you the basics of meditation within a week to 10 days. Then I scoured YouTube, podcasts, and the app store for additional resources and guided meditations. The Insight Timer app (free, versatile, and highly recommended) has been a long-time companion. I also recommend the apps Balloon, 7Mind, and Calm. Each app is a little different; you just have to find what works best for you. My needs and requirements are best met in the Calm app, which is why I currently use it daily.

Whether it's body scans, breathwork, visualization, or loving-kindness meditations, I still really enjoy guided meditations today because they always give me new inspiration. But I've also discovered meditating in complete silence. I'm also increasingly noticing how even everyday activities like washing dishes, painting, or brushing my teeth can be meditative.

The convenience factor

This is actually a very important point for me. At first, I found it incredibly difficult to sit cross-legged on the floor with a straight back. So I grabbed a chair and leaned back against it. I placed my legs side by side on the floor and enjoyed the feeling of my body being "rooted" to the ground. Sometimes I meditated lying down, even though some people advise against it (you might fall asleep). Or I did a walking meditation.

For some time now, I've been primarily using my meditation cushion, which my boyfriend gave me for Christmas two years ago, and I love it.

One of my principles, however, is that I meditate however it feels best for me. Some days that's on the meditation cushion, and other days lying down or on the couch.

One of the first things I learned about meditation was: You can't go wrongThis sentence helped me to make it my own and not put myself under pressure to achieve something by a certain point.

After about three months of daily meditation (which isn't really a short time), I was able to observe the first positive effects. I'll tell you about this part of my journey. here, in the second part of this blog post more. ☺️

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